Tuesday, March 24, 2015

I have worked really hard to be here.

First off I wanted to start this post off by saying that in no way shape or form did I give you away. I gave you a better life. I gave you everything your heart could dream of in the family I chose for you.  I also want to say that in no way shape or form did I give you away to get where I am right now or where I will be in the future. I didn't give you away at all. I keep you close to my heart on the daily bases. Not a day goes by that you are not in my mind or your name is not spoken from my lips. This is the truth for all my kids really and this post is not only for you but for them as well.

                           When I started my journey with Ultimate Medical Academy in 2009 you were not even a thought in my mind (Jv) Your siblings were small and I wanted to go back to school. I got my MBC degree first and moved on to the Pharmacy Degree. I always knew that this was the degree that was meant for me. This was the degree that was going to make me happy and this was the degree that I was going to use.  It would be that moment in time where I could look at myself and be proud because I made it happen. I am finally at that moment. There are many many events that lead to this all being possible and life being the way it is right now and I am not going to sit and talk about all of that. What I am going to talk about is how thankful I am that they happened. Out of every single person who helped me get to where I am today I am forever grateful. I am thankful for the experiences, the friendships, the memories, the words of encouragement and the uplifting when I did not think it was possible and yes I am even thankful for the heartaches. Without all of that I would not be where I am or who I am today. Your placement in my life was for a reason. You gave me something to aspire to. You gave me a reason to be a better person. Every single one of my children gave me that reason but you really emphasized it for me. You taught me that it was alright to not be the perfect person everyone thought you to be. You taught me it was OK to stumble and it was OK to get back up again and regardless of what anyone else thought that it was OK to give up. That is not saying that I gave up on you (Because I did not). Just in life in general.

                 There are many times in all of this I wanted to throw in the towel and quit but I did not. Every time I got to that point I would pick up the book and study harder. I want all my children to know that regardless of the situation and the way life has been that I have aspired to be something and dammit I made it. No reason in the world not to and every reason in the world to do it. Graduation is 4 days away and I just stepped in the door from a 2nd interview with a the pharmacy chain that I did my extern hours with and you know what I think I nailed it. I wrote a speech for graduation and submitted it as I was requested to do but I will not be speaking at graduation so I am going to share it here. To be honest with you I am kinda relieved that I am not going to be speaking because it has been a long time since I have stood in front of a large group of people and addressed them so I was sure to be extra nervous. I already had my almost heart failure for the week by going on Rockin Roller coaster in Hollywood studios yesterday so I am good. 

                                              UMA GRADUATION SPEECH

Good morning UMA graduates, administrators, advisors, staff, family and friends. I am honored to be standing up here speaking to all of you today. When I first started my journey with UMA I never imagined myself giving a speech at my commencement ceremony, I never saw myself actually graduating with a degree that I would want to actually use but here I stand. This is the second time I have graduated from UMA.  I started my journey in 2010 in the medical billing and coding program and I decided when I was done with that degree that I wanted to come back and get my degree in something that I always wanted to do. Now I will receive my Associates of health science Pharmacy Technician and start my career.  Those who helped us get to this day are sitting all around us and should not go unnoticed for the job that they do every single day. We might not have been some of the easiest students to work with at times but you all were there when we needed someone to listen, someone to help or someone to encourage us. I am sure I can say it for the entire graduating class, Thank you.
We each decided to come to Uma for different reasons I know for me I wanted my daughters and my son to know that their mom made a career for herself. I want them to know that nothing is impossible if you put your mind to it. Nothing is impossible if you try hard enough. I wanted my children to see that I made something of myself. I wanted them to know that no matter what your age you can always learn and accomplish something you may have only once dreamed about.  We are all on the verge of the next step of our lives and the possibilities are endless. No matter what your reasons for choosing Uma be proud of yourself for taking that step and sitting where you are today. In the words of one of the greatest children authors Dr. Seuss Oh, the Places You’ll go!  “Congratulations! Today is your day. You’re off to great places. You’re off and away!  You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose.  Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you. And when things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t Stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.”
Thank you and again Congratulations graduates.


I still can't believe that I actually wrote a speech for my own graduation. That I was even approached to write a speech for my graduation. These are the things that I want you all to know are possible. These are the things that despite not being picked to speak are still milestones and honors to have even been considered for. It really is mind blowing to think that I could quiet possibly be walking across that stage on Saturday morning with a job offer already on the table. WHO DOES THAT? These are all possibilities if you work hard enough and put your mind to it from the very beginning. I am so glad that I had the support, drive and determination. No one is going to go out there and do it for you. I am proud to be a graduate and have my degree It is among one of the biggest moments in my life as an adult. The other was being able to say I am your birth mom. This one's for you. You will be in my heart and on my mind as I walk across that stage and I hope that one day when you see this you can look at it and smile and be proud too.

One of the delimas that I had about graduation was what dress I was going to wear. There were three choices and I decided on one finally. Since I wanted you to be part of this day some way shape or form I decided to go with this dress.
It is a red dress (Obviously) from Torrid with Minnie Mouse all over it. Since I know your love for Disney I decided that it was the dress that was most appropriate for my college graduation. Not to mention we all know I am a Minnie Mouse lover and Disney lover as well. It was bound to happen.
 

Thursday, March 19, 2015

Coming down to the wire

Today I finished one of the 2 whole days I have left at the pharmacy before I graduate on the 28th of this month. I started this journey right after you left and it is hard to believe that I am almost at the end of it. I never thought I would get this far honestly. I did all of this because of you. Because of your siblings. I want all of my children to know that I did not just sit around and do nothing with my life. I want you all to know that I made something of myself and I got a degree or 2 in the process. I have had very little time to myself since this all started. It is weird. Before I started the extern part of this journey i was alone at home all of the time. Now I can hardly get 5 minutes to myself. Reminds me of attempting to even go to the bathroom alone when you were here. It never happened. I miss those moments. Who ever thought that you could miss a moment like that? there are so many I miss now that I would give anything to get back. I think most people just think that I am crazy.


Update......Finished my extership today. Hard to believe that all 180 hours of this journey are complete. Came home this afternoon and wrote out the essay that needed to be turned in and now all I have to do is walk when Graduation comes around. I have done it. Still hard to believe. This is my second degree since you have been gone and most likely my last but i am happy with that. I am thrilled over this degree and excited to walk for graduation. At least you cannot say that you did not come from college graduates. It might have been after you were with your momma Y and Daddy D. but it still happened.