Now What?

I have been thinking about you so much lately. Wondering what you are up to this summer? Wondering how tall you have gotten and the new words that you might be saying? I have been wondering all kinds of things and none of them I have any answers to. I try to imagine but it is almost impossible these days. I am certain that baby voice you had you don't have anymore. What I would not give to get a glimpse of you somewhere in public but I am sure it will never happen. I have not gotten photo's since March and it has really been bothering me considering the agreement stats 4 times a year. September 29th will be the end of the second year and we still have only gotten photos of you twice this year. So aggravating. Seems that talking to the agency and the attorney has yielded nothing in a response to my request for photos and a update. Where do I go from here? What do I do next? Is there anything I can do? Where do  I go from here? I miss you so much and it does not matter what I say or do I can't make them understand how important it is for me to at least get photos and updates. Why promise something if you are not going to do it? Why not just say that is not the way it is going to be for us.  Why not just say that you were not OK with this from the beginning? Why lie to me? The longer and longer I wait the more and more irritated and distraught I get. Why does it have to be this way? Why can't they put themselves in my shoes and understand the pain they are causing. Just once PLEASE JUST ONCE.